May 20, 2016

 

 

 

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“Ooooo Meisha. Now, that one there is a little bit snug. What have you been eating girl? You always have been a little chunky, thick baby. You were just the cutest baby ever. (Rambles off into one of the many memories she had with me as a baby)…. Wait, that one is perfect and very classy. What do you think?”

 

 

What do I think? I think that I am about to upchuck all over the place trying on these fitted homecoming dresses. She doesn’t even know! This lady that has always been like a second mom to me since infant days has no idea that there is a little life evolving inside of me as we speak. Lord, she is so prim, proper, and educated. Listen to her go on a tangent about how super proud she is of me. Heck, she changed my diapers, witnessed my first steps, and helped with all that in between then and now. Surely, aside from my mom, she deserves ample credit. However, right now, all that she knows is that I am her beloved niece with college offers pouring in left and right. At this moment, she is only interested in finding me the perfect dress for homecoming court tonight. How the heck am I going to stand in front of the entire Concord High School knowing that I am pregnant? That even sounds weird.

 

 

Me? Yes, you!

 

 

You’re pregnant girl. Repeat it – Pr-eg-nant!

 

 

Stop ignoring it Meisha.

 

 

The entire student body chose you as a nomination for court because you represented what a positive role model should be.

 

I’m supposed to be among the “most likely to succeed.” – Now look at me.

 

 

Tonight is a bit colder than most and I think my heels have sunken completely into the moist grass covering this football stadium. The bright stadium lights are glaring down on me and here I am on spotlight for peers, family, and friends to see. Oh well, I thought. I am here now and I must say, I am in love with my dress and hair. For a moment, I am felt like a simple high school student again instead of an expecting mom. I think about the nice pictures I will take tonight to post to my MYSPACE page later. I am snapped right back into reality as the urge to upchuck again comes back. Come on body. Work with me. Don’t do this now.

 

 

 They announce the third place winner for homecoming and fortunately that is not me (yes I meant fortunately). With so many cheerleaders and intelligent ladies as fellow nominees, I knew that this would be a tight race. I told my mom right before the whole ceremony started that to even be nominated was enough happiness for me, seriously. Being escorted by my brother (my absolute favorite male human being in the world) also gave me immense joy. He was proud of me. Deep down, I had my other reasons for not wanting to win though. I knew that I was on my way to being a 17 year old mom and I just didn’t feel deserving of placement as one of Concord High School’s leaders. I didn’t want the latest high school news to be focused on “the girl that won homecoming but got pregnant”. Boy, what a story that would be! I needed as little attention as I could get. See, I had it all planned out. I would fall off the radar so that when I started showing, I would not be the talk of the school as much. By then, they would forget about me, right?

 

“In second place we have… Ladies and gentlemen, this was a close one… Tal’Meisha Frontis!”

 

(EXPLETIVE!)

 

I mustered up the best smile that I could. The announcer didn’t stutter. Here I was winning runner up for homecoming queen out of the hundreds of ladies at my high school. They put the sash on me and after the announcements were all over, peers and family rushed by my side to take pics. I could have won a grammy award because no one knew my secret – no one but my bestfriend Alisha. I put on a show.

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By the time I got home, all I wanted to do was sleep. I don’t know if I was tired or if I just wanted to escape from reality a bit more. However, I knew there was one person I had to tell before I went to sleep. With that being said, I reached for my phone and found their contact number. This person was in my “most recents” anyway so the contact number wasn’t hard to find. I texted a few sentences and then I deleted them all. Honestly, the back and forth over what exactly to text and send went on for an hour. Finally, I had it:

 

       “I don’t know how to say this… but I’m 8 weeks pregnant… with our baby.”